Special Day

November 1st is a special day to us. It’s my husband’s birthday, but since last year (2013) it is and always will be that bit more special to us 🙂

1 year ago today we both were extremely nervous, as it was the day of the blood test at our fertility clinic. A few days before that we had our second embryo transfered via frozen transfer within our IVF procedure – and November 1st was the day to find out if our Snowflake actually cuddled up inside my belly.

I remember the phone call to the fertility clinic in the afternoon, calling in for the results of the blood test. My hands were shaking so much, and there was a fluttering in my chest that made it difficult to breathe. When I first called, I got told that the right person to tell the results was currently not at the phone and I should just call back in another 15 minutes or so. It felt like torture.

Those 15 minutes went by so slow, but at the same time I got more and more nervous with every minute closer to my second call-in. I thought I could not take much more of this and when I called again, the right person to tell me our result was at the phone, looking up my numbers (another few seconds that seemed like an eternity)…And then I heard the words that changed our lives:

“Congratulation Mrs. 🙂 – You are pregnant! (Beta hcG 624)”

It was the best birthday present for my husband, ever! Today he looked at our little girl sleeping and said: “It is my favourite birthday present this year, too” ❤

I baked chocolate chip mini muffins with white chocolate and sprinkles on top for the occasion 🙂

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Halloween IF grumpy cat reappears!『blogtober 2014』

Yesterday we went to the future (kind of), and today it’s throw-back-thursday for blogtober 2014 !

Your best or worst Halloween memory #TBT
Halloween is actually not that big of a thing here in Germany where I live, so I don’t really have specific memories for that special last day of October. I’m also someone who is frightened easily, and get a little heart attack everytime someone comes into the room a little too quiet for me to notice right away. I guess that makes me a bit of a Halloween fail.

BUT…there is one thing I get excited about when it comes to Halloween: PUMPKINS! I do enjoy the “pumpkin season” and love to see carved pumpkins and such. Last year, I took part in the “IF Pumpkin Smackdown 2013″ and actually carved a pumpkin myself for the first time. It was so much fun!
I carved an ‘Infertility Grumpy Cat’-pumpkin and you can see my blog post with pictures of it HERE. A little halloween-throw-back-sneak-peak
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I was on my two-week-wait back then after my frozen embryo transfer and it was such a good distraction from worrying and thinking about whether it will lead to a positive pregnancy test. Little did I know that our IVF miracle was actually already getting comfy in my belly and with us for this years Halloween. It’s definitely a memorable Halloween memory of mine.

When I started blogging…『blogtober 2014』

Here we go with day 6 of the blogtober 2014 event.

10 Things you’d tell yourself when you started blogging
As stated in yesterdays blog post, I’m not one to make a list of things I want to accomplish in a certain time span. Hence I couldn’t give you a list of 10 things that I told myself when I started this blog. I don’t even think I really did tell myself something back then.

I started this blog as a place to post random musings, to ramble on about various thoughts running through my mind. Back then I was dealing with Endometriosis based infertility and our IVF-journey. It was a really difficult time, where I myself realized I was on the verge of not being able to cope with it all that well. Luckily, our second IVF cycle (the first frozen transfer attempt) our little snowflake decided to stick with us and is smiling at me now in her sleep as I type this 🙂

During that difficult time and the pregnancy that followed I did a bunch of crafty things: crochet, knitting, cross stitch. (You can see all my posts in the handmade category here). So my blog became more of a crafty picture type of thing.
And now I want to get back into writing a bit more in my entries, which is why I participate in this blogtober14 event.

 

 

 

Finally…in our arms ♥ Baby Album cover art

After a long journey, struggling with infertility due to Endometriosis, going through fertility treatments (IVF), our “Snowflake” from a frozen transfer stuck with us . Finally, in the early hours of July 18th, 2014 we were able to hold our precious daughter in our arms!

We are overflown with joy and excitement of what each new day brings and love to cuddly with our “Snowflake”. As she turns 1 week old today – I want to show you what I did to her Baby album cover (I went all crafty before birth to pass the waiting time). You see, she also has been given a ‘real’ name, obviously 😉

BABY ALBUM (front cover)

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I cross stitched her name ‘Nanami’ as well as some little decorational motives. The “subtitle” reads: Little summer snowflake. To add some playfulness I took buttons and just randomly put them on there as well. The crochet border is supposed to add some summer-vibes.

FRONT COVER INSIDE

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On the inside of the front cover I put a cross stitch owl family and in Japanese it says “Papa, Mama, Nanami” above their heads. I wrote down the lyrics of a song that just speaks right from our heart.

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The pages inside which we hope to fill with lots of photos are of different length because I put the same type of crochet border on each page as the front cover has. It’s just more vibrant and cheery that way I thought 🙂

On the inside of the BACK COVER I put the seasonal owls that I already posted a while ago on my blog here

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On our choice of name – NANAMI

It’s a name of Japanese origin that is usually written in simple Hiragana ななみ without having a meaning. If it is written in Kanji like this: 七海 it has the meaning of ‘seven seas.’ (To hear the pronounciation CLICK HERE )

We like to interpret the meaning of the Kanji as “Cosmopolitan”, because the “7 seas” go all around the world. We want our Snowflake to go wherever she wants to go in this world & have her discover the various, different, unique parts of the world on her own way. By that, we not only think of the geographical world, but also the different, colorful cultures, lifestyles, life plans people have (i.e. a couple = not just man/woman etc).

In that sense^^^^we hopefully manage to raise our girl to be an open-minded, cosmopolite person who will be able to live a colorful life with her very own mind ❤

 

 

 

with my ‘omamori’ in hand…

Still on the dreaded two-week-wait after Frozen Embryo Transfer, and with all the emotions going from hopeful highs through the valley of worries, everything that gives you some sort of peace of mind (and soul) is much welcome.

This time I’m basically attached to this little thing, keeping it in my hand or around my wrist all the time.

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I bought it during my latest trip to Japan in September. It’s called an ‘Omamori’ (お守り)。The word ‘mamoru’ literally means ‘to protect’ but in general they are thought of as luck charms or talisman. You get them for all kinds of different purposes: safety while driving, good health, successful marriage, giving birth smoothely, luck with money, luck with exams etc. You get the drift.

This particular one on the photo^^ that I carry around with me these days is for ‘receiving a child’ (ko-uke 子受け), which is what we are hoping for right now: to finally be one of the lucky ones to receive a child aka. become pregnant & STAY pregnant.

I’m a realist, but in times like these, when hope is all you can cling to while waiting on a result, I’m happy to embrace everything that keeps my hope up.

 

We do make pretty blastocysts

We had our 1st Frozen Embryo/Blastocyst Transfer and now I’m on the dreaded 2-week-wait with a little “snowflake” on board. It all went smooth and we felt just as excited as we did with our first fresh transfer. Hoping >SO< much that this one sticks & keeps growing for the whole 9 month.

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It’s quite fascinating for me to look at this picture – not just because this hopefully is our baby, but also because I’m fascinated to be able to see it at this stage – all thanks to modern science!! We all looked like this little bundle of cells, but very few of us get to have a snapshot of themselves at this stage. Don’t get me wrong, if I could choose, I’d reather be superfertile over having this picture any day, but that’s not the case so I’m enjoying the little things like getting to see a glimpse of awesome. The lab-lady and my doctor both commented on how beautiful developed the blastocyst looked.

Fertiles and other people are often quick to brag, saying “we do make pretty babies”…So I’m taking the liberty to brag and say “We do make pretty blastocysts” , yea!!!